just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
