sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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