I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Barsexuality is the new black.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
