what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
