Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
