home. puking in laundry basket.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
