There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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