meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize