I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
