I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
