Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
