I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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