this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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