how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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