I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Randomize
