I wish my penis had an off switch
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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