i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
