How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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