Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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