My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
