She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
