we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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