We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize