Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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