can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
