WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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