Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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