In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
