You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
