I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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