yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize