Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
