Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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