I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
