shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
