I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize