i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
