I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
