Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
