In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
