ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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