First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
