If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
