taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
