okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Randomize
