normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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