What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Randomize
