Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
