well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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