I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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