its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
ugly people sure do ruin things
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
We left the knife in your bed.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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